Photographer: Okay, all the women in front. You with the cleavage, front and centre.
Harper: You sure this won't look too obvious?
Photographer: Look, buddy, you wanna show this "diversity" thing, right? Unless you got more hard-core female party members hiding over in the bushes, you're going to have to make them visible.
Harper: I'm tapped out. Throw me a line, sport.
Photographer: Fine, some of them can go to the right end, but stay near the front. A lot of people read and view pictures clockwise, so they'll register first.
Harper: That's a relief. Now, about the visible minorities.
Visible Minorities: We're standing right here, you know. We can hear you.
Harper: Whatever. You knew what you were getting into when you signed up.
Photographer: Okay, this is a little tricky, because I have even less material to work with... Put two of them near the front and centre, but throw another one into the right so we don't look like we're clustering them too much.
Harper: Why not have one on the left, one in the centre, and one on the right?
Photographer: That's even more obvious. What about the asian?
Harper: He's not that visible. Let him blend with the rest. People can play "where's Waldo" with him if they have the time.
Photographer: Okay, you're the boss, boss. Everybody say "cheese"
Visible Minority: You're telling me.
A cheap shot? Maybe... but just because Dion is being the better person, doesn't mean I have to be. This little work of fiction won't hurt Harper too much, even if people DO end up reading this. Why? Because his www.conservative.ca has him hiding behind the ultimate shield:
Who would dare judge such a well meaning and poised family man?
I wonder what they're watching. Could it be this?
Yep. On that page, they're trashing Dion for not knowing what a car pool is, and using a chauffer to drive... Which would be fair except for the part where he is colour blind and thereby doesn't drive for safety reasons... And likely knows about car pooling but not the English word for it. I'm getting pretty sick of him getting trashed for struggling with English... it is the cheapest of shots.
Dumbest question of the day award goes to this link:
WHY does Dion use the same plane used in the last three liberal elections, even though it is a gas guzzler? Could it be that he hates the environment? The answer is simpler. The Liberal Party can't afford a new one. Embarrassing, yes, but hardly a deliberate swipe against the environment.
I'm not a huge fan of Dion. I'm not a huge detractor either. I just can't stand the idiocy of the conservative attack dog campaign.
It gets better... from CTV news online...
In an exclusive interview aired today on CTV's Question Period, Harper said he expects a nasty election campaign.
"To be really honest, I anticipate a very nasty, kind of personal-attack campaign," he told Lloyd Robertson, CTV's chief news anchor and senior news editor, taped Saturday at Harrington Lake.
"That's just what I'm anticipating; that's what the opposition has done in the past. I think that whether Canadians agree with what we're doing or not, I don't think they're going to believe the kind of personal attacks and scare tactics that we've seen in the past."Puh-lease.
If all of the insulting "not a leader" attacks against Dion haven't been "personal", I'll eat my socks. He has a lot of gall to predict a "nasty" "personal attack" campaign from the other parties when he has been the one to set the tone. He never stopped campaigning, even after being elected 2.5 years ago.
I hope that Canadians see through his false "leadership" argument, and vote Harper and Co. out of office...